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Professional matchmakers reveal why some of their black male clients feel intimidated by black women. Why is it so hard for black women to find the love they deserve in our new dating series kiss and tell essence plays matchmaker for four single ladies living. The real reasons 70% of black women are single: it's not what they're telling you by jj smith we’ve all heard on oprah, cnn, abc news, and the washington post that 70% of black women are. After years of growth, the proportion of births that are to unmarried women has leveled off, and since 2009 has been at just over 40 percent.